


peace of mind and shattered sound

by emilia_kaisa



Series: advent challenge 2019 [3]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Choices, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Kind of a character study, Not Beta Read, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2019-12-03
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:14:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21658867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilia_kaisa/pseuds/emilia_kaisa
Summary: Javi looked even younger when he was asleep, especially now, with his face pale and a few tears still hanging on his eyelashes, small and glimmering in the light of a night lamp.It was good, that he was asleep, he needed all the rest after that terrible, terrible day.
Relationships: Javier Fernández & Sergei Voronov
Series: advent challenge 2019 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1559338
Comments: 5
Kudos: 7





	peace of mind and shattered sound

**Author's Note:**

> Third installment of the advent challenge!  
> Set in Fukuoka in 2011 where Morozov's group was training for worlds.  
> Song: 'Tidal wave' by Old Sea Bridge

_It's heavy now_

_We don't train_

_Come back down_

_Keep it sane_

_Spinnin' room_

_Lost my mind_

_Keep it up_

_Killin' time_

Javi looked even younger when he was asleep, especially now, with his face pale and a few tears still hanging on his eyelashes, small and glimmering in the light of a night lamp.

It was good, that he was asleep, he needed all the rest after that terrible, terrible day.

Sergei knew he should probably go to sleep too, his body and mind screaming from exhaustion, but instead he kept on sitting on his bed and looking at his teammate, heart heavy and head full of thoughts.

It really couldn't go on like that, Sergei knew it, and he knew it that Javi understood that too, but for some reason he was refusing to acknowledge that, clutching desperately to his dreams as hopes and not seeing that they were slipping through his fingers anyway.

They didn't know each other for all that long, barely a year of training together, but Sergei liked to think that they were friends, spending days on the rink and outside of it, always somewhere close, laughing, joking in their limited English. It felt good, to have someone like Javi around, with his warmth and smile he had for everyone even through the toughest of days.

He was a ray of sunshine, but he shouldn't be there.

He could achieve anything he wanted in life, but not like that, not in that place and not surrounded by those people who couldn't give him even a little bit of attention and warmth and kindness he needed.

Javi moved a little under the covers, eyes opening a little, blinking in the dim light, fingers clutching the edge of the blanket. 

“Is it safe?” he asked, voice muffled and sleepy, anxiety not yet taking over his body again. 

“You’re okay.” Sergei reassured him, hopping out of his bed and making his way to Javi “Sorry for the light.”

“It’s okay.” Javi mumbled, closing his eyes and seeming to relax a little bit “I like it.”

“Okay.” Sergei nodded, reaching out to touch Javi’s forehead and wincing a little when his fingertips brushed hot, dry skin “Try to get some sleep.”

“I want to go home.”

A quiet, broken voice.

“Soon.” Sergei promised, wincing again when his thought went to the conversation they had had with their coach only a few hours before.

“I don’t mean Moscow.” Javi sniffled, opening his eyes again “I want to go home.”

“Then you will.” Sergei said, thumb brushing over Javi’s brow “Now, close your eyes, and it will be good.”

Javi stared at him for a few more seconds before sighing deeply, his eyelids fluttering. 

Next day during breakfast Javi didn’t stop smiling, even for a moment, taking care of Miki who was sitting quietly with a pained frown on her face, and only that faint shadow in his eyes was showing what exactly what was going inside him.

Always hidden, buried behind his sunny expression, but Sergei knew. He knew, and he understood that there was no other way.

_Pick it up_

_As if you found_

_Peace of mind_

_And shattered sound_

_Extra days_

_To sit around_

_Wonder why_

_You can't be found_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!


End file.
